Investigative writing while lacking basic skills 1.01

Investigative writing while lacking basic skills 1.01

It can be daunting and difficult to try to write for an established and well loved publication like Earlectrek. Especially for a person who doesn’t own a Tesla or posses Elon Musk likes or replies; aka Tesla Twitter bitcoin.

The complete lack of talent and knowledge doesn’t help either.

Nevertheless, in the tradition of several well established journalists, this is not going to stop me.

I will ask all the boring questions (clever pun intended).

While spending nearly an hour on unbiased research on Twitter I was surprised to find a community of people, bound by a common goal and world view. 

They do refer to themselves as “short bears” which is very adorable.

Even if, to quote an often used statement, size doesn’t matter, it’s refreshing to see such honesty on Social Media.

They care a lot about Tesla. They  are basically short Care Bears. 

Here some of the main issues the short Care Bears are very worried about, I hope I got it right:

  • Elon Musk: the general existence 
  • Demand too low: you can see Tesla cars in parking lots, driveways and streets all over the world. A sure sign that Tesla is hiding cars because they have to many leftovers 
  • Demand too high: does everyone own a Tesla? No, because they don’t make enough cars 
  • Demand cliff: the cliff demand jumps off because it’s tired of always being too high or too low 
  • Paint issues: Tesla cars have different colours. They have issues with calculating and buying enough colour to paint every car in the same colour 
  • Panel gaps: those gaps they try to hide with glass 
  • It’s an EV: driving and accepting a car which is generally connected with a more caring attitude in regards to the environment and fellow humans is difficult for short bears. No impressive engine sounds, nothing which would make a short bear feel better for a while 

Unfortunately it turned out to be difficult to have a good, friendly conversation with those short Bears, they seem to get very hostile quite quickly. 

They do seem to get rather confused if a female tries to approach them using the written language, so they do react with rather aggressive language as a coping mechanism.

After a while they get their role as bears mixed up and block your account, the Twitter equivalent of playing dead. 

I won’t stop investigating, always with my goal, to write for Earlectrek, in mind.

Norman’s Take

Buy a Tesla, with Earl’s code, quick before they go bankwupt:


Miss NotFred

Only allowed to write here because I created and declared myself Head of the Non existing Legal Department and threatened to sue

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