New Colors for Tesla

New Colors for Tesla

Today Tesla announced a series of new paint colors specifically curated for cold weather climates. While unveiling the new colorways Tesla Chief Designer Franz von Holzhausen said “I was on a ski vacation and noticed that all the cars were some sort of earth tone. If that’s what people want then we decided that’s what we should give them.”

Model 3 in GrimyGrey

The new colors are Salty Silver, Grimy Grey, Wash me White, Bathe me Blue MagClor-Red and Blech (also known as “Why did I by black?”).

Tesla Model 3 in Bathe me Blue

The new colors will be available only in select areas beginning with the Rocky Mountains, followed by Canada, the US North East and finally the Mid-West. The colors will not be sold in Arizona, Southern California (although special orders may be available for buyers in the Sierras) or Germany.

Model 3 in Blech (aka Why did I buy black?)

Part of a focus on blending in with nature, the new colors show an earthier side to the otherwise flashy designs.

Rare Model x in Wash me White

Said von Holzhausen “We are excited to introduce a revolutionary shift in automotive paint colorways. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m meeting Elon for the premier of the new Ashton Kutcher movie Dude, Wash My Car.”

Fred Fredly

Fred Fredly got tired of driving slow, stinky polluting cars so he bought a Tesla. Despite appearances to the contrary, he does actually wash his car from time to time.